Lindsay Lohan talks straight about toxic relationship

The chequered life of Lindsay Lohan is perhaps more well known to the general public than to herself, such was the extent of her abuse of drink and drugs.

In and out of prison, rehab and love, it's fair to say that the child star, even now only 26, has had a rough few years. Driving under the influence, possession of cocaine and shoplifting jewellery have seen 'Li-Lo' subjected to intermittent periods of enforced cold turkey behind bars rather than getting smashed at them.

For some, bending to the will of others just doesn't work. Lindsay Lohan is one of those 'some'. It seemed that the rebel within would never cede to changing her ways unless it was of her own volition.

Lindsay Lohan back home in native New York

In a reflective mood, back in The Big Apple with and around people with whom she trusts and feels safe, Lindsay Lohan has opened up about her two-and-a-half year relationship with DJ Sam Ronson.

It's little coincidence that these desperate times began towards the end of Lohan's relationship with her English lover. The young Disney starlet's life has been spiraling out of control ever since; up until now, at least.

What is very clear in her mind is that, no matter how much Lindsay Lohan was in love with the London-born DJ, nine years her senior, individually the two were toxic. And despite them now being friends, she accepts fully that 'toxic people cannot be together'.

Lohan has to learn to love herself

It's hardly surprising that, during these last three years of self-indulgent addiction, Lindsay Lohan has had no other serious relationships. There have been dalliances, for sure, but her split from Ronson left her heartbroken.

[caption id="attachment_5430" align="alignright" width="646"]London DJ Sam Ronson Lindsay Lohan heartbroken at spilt with Ronson, pictured
(CC wikimedia commons)[/caption]

The heartbreak remains all the more poignant for having come out of the closet and admit that she was in love with another female when their relationship first went public. Not being able to love herself for who she'd become made her question her readiness to even consider loving anyone else.

What she doesn't seem to be able to get into her head is that it was her fault. If Lindsay Lohan is to eventually see beyond the bottom of the bottle, she cannot keep blaming the 'sycophants and bad influences' she credits for leading her astray.

Whilst I've no doubt that there were hangers on who had ulterior motives for getting Lindsay stoned, pissed or worse, it is not, as she puts it, 'human nature' for kids to try 'cigarettes, drugs and drinking'. It's a very personal choice, one that only insecurity forces you to make.

Blaming loneliness isn't the answer either. We can only imagine the hell of being photographed from the minute you walk out of your front door until you get back through it at night. "Lonely" is not a word you associate with that situation.  Guilt, frustration and insecurity all seem to fit the bill more readily.

Even if an element of loneliness was involved, being back in her native New York may help get her back on her feet.

If, on the other hand, New York is where the shenanigans all started, what's to stop it happening all over again?